Belated Birthday Post

I don't even know why I didn't post last night. I guess I was just too happy from that end-of-the-day birthday bliss!  It was such a nice day!  I was reminded how many people in my life I love and how many of them love me back!  I am blessed in every way! 

We went to a church couples dinner/dance and had so much fun!  We have some awesome couples in our ward/neighborhood and it was so fun to hang out with them!  We listened to music and even danced.  It was so much fun!

So hard

I think this project gets harder and harder each day.  I really don't feel like I have much to say! There really isn't anything exciting about my life, so I worry about boring any potential readers!  Today was a good day.  I stayed home most the day, did some cleaning, caught up some stuff on the computer and watched a lot of basketball!  I love March Madness!  Tomorrow is my birthday, and I can't believe I will be 38.  Mitchell was so excited to give me my present early, so I took a picture of it for my day!  He wrote me a book of poems, and I thought I would share just one:

Mom you're as sweet as cake and ice cream
38's not as old as it seems.

Maybe that just says it all!  I sure love my kids!

I love my Son

Well, I love all 4 of my boys, but today, I felt like spotlighting my eldest.  He is such a sweet and great boy!  I am so thankful to know him and have him as a son.  He sets a great example for his siblings and really sets the tone in our home!  He was cast as Gaston in the school musical, and I think he loves having all those silly girls chasing him!  He is such a fun actor, and I love seeing him love something so much!

Stop Jumping on the Trampoline Naked

If I had a dollar for every time I find myself saying these words, I would be a very rich woman!  Sam LOVES to jump with all his clothes shed on the lawn.  My poor sweet neighbor.  She is a wonderful sweet elderly woman who just loves me and my kids and makes me smile everytime I see her!  I'm sure Sam has given her a chuckle on more than one occasion.  Most of the time, I don't care.  Maybe I should.  But I don't.  There are way too many other things I can worry about.  It makes him happy, and hey, if that's all it takes, well, for now, go for it!  However, I did draw the line today when he headed out the front door (still completely naked) to ride his scooter down the driveway.  I explained that he had to keep the naked thing to the back yard!

(I know I'm still lacking like 2 weeks of pictures. Things have just been crazy, but I promise the picture for today does have Sam clothed!)

Busy Wonderful Day

I know I am so behind on pictures.  Hopefully I will have time tomorrow to catch up on them! I'm seriously slacking on all things computer!  It has just been so busy and by the evening when I have a little time to catch up, I'm so tired!  I have lots of pics, even uploaded, I just need to crop, size and post them! 

Today I took the kids to a little farm close to our house.  They loved it!  It was so fun and Sam did so well.  He didn't run away once and he interacted with us just like a normal boy his age.  His speech is still a bit difficult, but he really says so  much.  It is just mostly vowels which can be a bit tricky!

He found a worm today too, that he fell in love with.  In fact, on the way home (yes, I actually let him carry it in the car) he sort of split the worm in half and who knows what else, but it clearly had gone to meet its maker by the time we arrived home.  Sam didn't care though, he promptly buried him in the dirt.  A few hours later, when we went to pick up kids from school, he had to bring wormie.  Needless to say, the poor dead worm was still waiting in the same spot and got to take another road trip in the hands of Sam.  I was just thrilled at his level of interest.  He has been making so much progress and it thrills me for the future.  For so long, I allowed things I read to tell me what to expect for and from Sam.  It created a lot of ceilings for him and me.  I mourned the loss of all the things he may never be able to do.  Lately, I have decided to throw all that out the window.  Sam may have a diagnosis of several things, but they do not define him.  He still has all the potential for a wonderful future that my other children do!  And honestly, I love exploring each new day with him and seeing who he is becoming!  It is an amazing adventure!

Happy Baby

I fell asleep last night without blogging.  It's the first time that has happened since the beginning of the year.  I was so tired though, and this darn time change isn't helping any!  We had a good day at church today, and a really nice afternoon.  It just went way too fast!  I love this picture and the amazing smile on Noah's face!  He laughed and laughed last night as Chipper played with him!  It was adorable!
 

Crazy Weather

Even though the date stamp and time show it to be very early on Sunday morning, I haven't technically been to bed yet, so I can still count it as Saturday!  It's 4 am, but I couldn't go to sleep without blogging! Am I crazy?

Today was a good day with crazy weather.  It started out cloudy, then rained, then turned to sleet, then to snow and when I went out this evening to a friend's house, it was that super cold windy snow!  Definitely did not feel like the almost 60 degrees we had the day before!

I had a great day, though.  First, I got to meet a friend that designs with me at my shop, Brownie Scraps.  She lives in Salt Lake, and it was fun to go meet her and her two children!  We had a lot of fun!  Then I hung out with the family, ate yummy food and just enjoyed being together!  Tonight when everyone was headed to bed, I went to my friend Angela's house where she was having a raw foods party!  It was a blast, and I'm even more anxious than before to learn more!  I have been intrigued by eating all raw food for about 7 years now, but have never managed to fully make the switch.  It is coming slowly, but I gained a lot of new info and some yummy recipes tonight that I can't wait to try!  After the party, several of us stayed and talked for hours and hours, but it was so fun!  I haven't done that in years!

And now, I'm thinking I better go get a little sleep since the baby will probably be up in about 2 hours!

Big Brothers

I couldn't help but having to snap this picture (it will be here tomorrow, I promise) of Sam and Noah walking.  Sam isn't always Noah's favorite person.  In fact, often when Noah sees Sam getting close he screams!  There is a bit of history there, since Sam likes to hit Noah (softly, but still) and other not so nice things.  However, lately, Sam loves to help Noah learn to walk.  It is so precious and Noah thinks it is the best thing ever!

Every, Every Minute

As I sit here, ready to write tonight, I struggle finding anything exciting that happened.  Life can be funny that way sometimes.  Lots of big things can happen in a few days that you feel like you can't write it all out.  Then there are days that are just as normal and quiet and well, boring that you even wonder if you have anything worth writing about.  Nothing exciting happened today.  Nothing bad happened today.  It was just a day.

And even though, most who may read this, could care less as to how many diapers I changed or how often I had to sweep the floor, or how quickly I tried to pull a naked Sam off the trampoline before any neighbors wondered what was going on, to me, it was a precious day.  It was a day of normal living.  It was waking up to the sounds of my 10 month old and hurrying to get others awake, breakfast on the table, hair done, shoes found, faces checked as some rush out the door.  It was a day of doing laundry and washing dishes and wiping noses.  It was a day of noise and play and fighting.  It was a day of grocery shopping and music lessons and song practice for the upcoming Easter program.  This is my life and nothing could represent the beauties in it, more than a simple day like today.

When I was in high school, I played the part of Emily in the Thornton Wilder play, "Our Town".  I loved this play!  I even used a monologue from it to audition in college.  My very favorite lines in the play are at the very end.  Emily has just died while in child birth and she gets to go back for just one day.  It was an ordinary day, nothing special about it at all, and yet at the end, she is overwhelmed by the memory and the specialness of it all.

Here, at this point in my life, when I feel that I can barely catch my breath somedays, I find joy and sadness in the every day.  Even the monotony of days goes way too quickly.  And I find myself, tonight, remembering Emily's words at the end of the play, "Do any human beings ever realize life while they live it?--every, every minute"

Tired

I have no idea why, but I have been so tired all week.  I just feel like I'm dragging.  As a result, we didn't do much today.  I did some cleaning, but mostly tried to rest.  Rest isn't exactly easy with six kids and a hubby out of town!  But, I'm off to bed now, and hopefully tomorrow will be better!  I will catch up the pictures tomorrow. I have them all taken and even most of them  uploaded, I just need to resize and post!

Quiet Ordinary Day

It was kind of nice to have a quiet day.  I didn't have to go anywhere outside of our little section of the world and it felt like a normal day.  I have enjoyed seeing family and all the fun and activities, but it was nice to just sort of exist today! 

Sam is still enjoying the trampoline and sneaks out there at every opportunity.  The other children are enjoying it as well, so its very nice!  This evening I was able to go to a church party and it was so fun.  I just love the women in our ward and have so many wonderful friends!

My Cutie

I just love this picture of Noah!  I took this today while we were out and visiting the dinosaur museum with cousins!  We had so much fun, even though it was pretty crazy!  We had five adults and 8 children under the age of 5!  Yeah, definitely crazy!!!  We only lost Sam once though, so that is a huge bonus in my book!

Things have improved so much with  my little guy.  Since taking him off all dairy and wheat, he has cleared up and has actually gained a couple of pounds.  I'm so excited by this!  There is nothing worse than worrying about your baby! 

The trampoline is still paying off, big time!  That is the only thing Sam wants to do.  In fact, as I got him ready for bed tonight, I asked him if he was excited to go to school tomorrow (normally he ADORES school). Tonight he said, "no bus (meaning riding the bus to school and attending school), boo (food) and bump bump (jump jump).  So, its good to know he has his priorities in the right place!

Family

Today we had a wonderful time with John's family.  Everyone was there except for his sister, Merri's husband who couldn't get off work back in Florida!  But other than that, everyone was present and accounted for!  It was fabulous!  10 adults and all 12 of the grandchildren (1/2 of whom are mine!) were crowded around tables set up in the dining room and living room!  It was crazy and loud and hectic and complete bliss!  We don't get to see some of the family very often, so it was wonderful to catch up and see all the cousins in action!  My nieces, Morgan and Ashley are 14 and 12 and live in Las Vegas.  They are both preparing to do a production of Beauty and the Beast, just like Chipper!  It was fun to watch them bounce lines off each other!  Noah was in heaven, just bouncing from one person to another.  He wasn't shy a bit!  The weather was beautiful and we even gathered outside for some pictures!  It was a very nice day!

Tears

I will post the picture lately, but I am worn out tonight from many many tears.

I have often felt cursed, in my life, for how close to the surface my emotions are.  I can cry at commercials!  Today was one of those days that I wished I could have held everything inside and not shed a tear.  As we said goodbye to Grandma and laid her earthly body to rest, I couldn't control the flood of emotions and the waterfall of memories.  At moments, it was a bit too much to process and I had to remind myself to breathe.  Don't get me wrong, I am so thankful that she is no longer suffering, and I know that she is where she needs to be.  I know she lived an incredible life-the type we all dream of living.  It was just that I remembered every kind thing she ever did for me, the squishy hugs she was so good at, and the amazing amounts of love she had for her family and everyone around her.  For just a moment, I wished I could pause time and rewind.  Not that I wanted to go back a few days and see her one more time.  I wanted to go back through the years and relive all the moments.  Life is beautiful and heart wrenching at the same time.  Each day comes and goes and there is nothing we can do to change that.  And no matter how hard we try to cherish it and hold on to it, it still slips on by.  And with that, new generations are born and old generations must pass by.  At one point, just like me, she wrestled with 6 children and the daily chores that needed to be done.  She held them and kissed them and poured all the love into that job, just as I try to do each day.  She watched them each go away to school, get married, have children and watched them grow.  She attended all the important events, held the new babies, kissed the toddlers and watched each day of life come and go.  I'm sure it all felt like a matter of moments, as she prepared to end her life here.  I guess part of my tears today were not only for my deep love for her, but also an appreciation for the life she lived and in part, my tears were for me, knowing that I too must pass through the trials she did and in the end leave it all behind.  I'm thankful to know and believe with all my heart that this life is not the end.  I cling to that faith as I feel that life is just a big whirlwind, going way too fast!

I will miss her so much.  Even today, I expected her to walk in and brighten the room with her smile.  But, I will always hold her dear.  And I will work to live my life like she did and look forward to meeting her again.

Snow, Snow and More Snow

I finally get to blog about snow! Yay!  We actually had a real snow storm today! It was beautiful!  And it was the perfect now.  Almost a foot, but not cold outside and most had melted by night!  The roads weren't bad, but it was that perfect snowman building snow!  Of course, the fact that it is March means that I couldn't build a snowman!  Heavens no. Those are for December and January!  I build the Easter Bunny!

My Little Monkey

The photo will be posted soon, but I just love how into exploring my little Noah is.  This is such a fun age!  The dishwasher is truly one of his favorite toys.  Usually, he just loves to take everything out as fast as the older kids can fill it!  But, I had to snap a picture today, when I saw him like this!

Fixing the motorcycle

Sam has always struggled with using imagination.  It is not something that comes easy or natural for him. However, lately, due in part to the HUGE imagination of his little sister, he has started imaging and playing a bit more!  I love it!  I enjoy every moment of their play!   Today, they brough in his scooter, but they called it a motorcycle and they were fixing it.  Their tools included a jumprope, the can opener and a large spoon!  Needless to say, they had a blast and the scooter has never run better!

My Latest Project

Well, you all probably know by now that I don't like pictures of myself, so this little book was hard for me to do.  But, I decided that it would be nice to have a little album about me, not only for me to look back on, but for my kids to remember who I was in 2010!  I included all my favorites and my 4 goals to accomplish before I turn 40!  It will be fun to look back and see if I did it!  Maybe it's the fact that I've lost 3 loved ones in the past 5 months, but it  has reminded me that it is little things like this that we will leave behind as concrete evidence that we existed!  My kids may not remember that my favorite movie of all time is Pride and Prejudice, that my very favorite food is enchiladas (okay, they will probably remember that one!) or that I really truly want to run a marathon, publish a book, go on a cruise and grow a successful garden in the remaining two years before I turn 40.  But this is a small way I can document me for them!  I plan to put it in my hope chest, along with all the other little treasures that make me who I am!  Hopefully, someday, when my time on earth is done, they can take each one out and spend just a few more minutes remembering the little things that make me me!  And hopefully, they will also know and remember that I love them!

Spring

This picture is actually of us at Chuck E. Cheeses, before we headed out to play.  Apparently, I only imagined taking all the fun pics of us in the sunshine! 

Grandma passed away this  morning, and it still doesn't seem real.  I didn't go and say goodbye.  There wasn't a chance between one of us needing to be with the kids and my own fears.  I don't like losing those I love.  I don't like things changing.  I don't like to admit that I am getting older with each day, that some day my own children will be the adults and I don't like reminders of how quickly life passes.  I am grateful to have had her in my life.  I lost my own grandmother when I was 15, and it about broke my heart.  I loved her so much.  When John and I were dating and I met his grandmother for the first time, I knew she was meant to be my grandma, as well!  She was very easy to adopt!   I'm thankful for the beliefs I have about life and death.  I am grateful to know that I will see her again!

Other than that piece of sad news, today was a beautiful day!  The weather was warm, the snow has all melted and I got to spend a few hours out working in my yard!  It was heaven.  I could have spent the whole day!  I have big plans (don't I always) for my yard this year! I want a HUGE garden with vegetables that we can eat all summer long!  I want to grow several lilac bushes (they remind me of my grandma) and all sorts of other flowers and plants.  I want to grow herbs that I can use in my cooking.  I envision spending the summer picking weeds, watering plants and just sitting out on my porch enjoying it all!  See, I really am getting old!  It's easy to imagine every dream, when the first hint of spring hits the air.  And almost as wonderful as the sunshine today, I enjoyed the other signs that spring was on the way.  I saw three boys pulling out their basketball hoop and setting it up, children were on their bikes, 2 siblings sat giggling on their trampoline, 2 sisters dug with mini shovels in the flower garden in front of their house.  We were all ready to leave the bleak, cold winter and just soak up the sunshine!


Tomorrow is supposed to be even warmer!