Funny Moments

Lately I have been spending a lot more time with Sam, just trying to let him be him and seeing the world from his view.  I've decided that he doesn't need to do thing my way to be normal, I just need to understand things the way he does.  This has been an amazing gift and given me so much insight into my darling little man!  Getting his ideas out can sometimes entail a lot of charades, but it can be fun!  I thought I would share a few things tonight.

Olivia talks daily about getting a puppy.  She is obsessed and is planning and planning for this new addition, even though we have told her it will be at least a year before mom is ready for another "baby".  At first, Sam would always say "no (insert panting dog sound), horse"  Yes, he believed we should get a horse instead of a dog.  Well, yesterday as we were walking, he said, "mammy, no (insert panting dog sound), ooh ooh, ah, ah"  I said, "you want a monkey?"  He nodded, with much excitement and said it again.  I found it so cute that he had really thought it out!  Of course, Olivia was quick to put things in perspective, as she said we don't have a tree for a monkey.

The other cute thing, took a bit more work to get out of him, so I'll save the actual dialogue.  We were discussing hair cuts, and he kept pointing to his chin and jaw line.  Finally, we figured out and he confirmed that he wanted a hair cut and a beard-at the same time!  He was convinced that I could just use the cut hair to make the beard.

He is a delight and I find myself enjoying him so much more than I ever thought possible.  Don't get me wrong, I've always held a special place for him in my heart.  As a baby, he was in and out of the hospital on a regular basis.  I was with him during most of those times and we had quite the bond.  Many times, when he is upset or scared, I am the only one he wants.  This can be draining and rewarding all at once.  But, I will admit, the past few years have been hard.  As he would make mess after mess and give me countless scares, I just felt worn out all the time.  I truly felt like he did those things, just to punish me, and sometimes he truly did.  If I didn't give him what he wanted, he would storm upstairs (to his room-or so I thought) only to find that he had locked himself in my room and ruined all of my makeup or flooded the bathroom while throwing in my blow dryer and curling iron with all the water. 

But he has taught me that those things don't really matter-they are just things.  And as I strive to understand his frustration, I feel great compassion for him.  I feel bad for the times I get upset and rush to judgment.  Someday, I hope to have true charity-unconditional love that overwhelms every other emotion.  I know if I have any chance of having that, it will come from these precious moments with Sam.  What a blessing he is in my life!

And because I do have 5 other children that I absolutely adore, I don't want to make it sound like Sam is my only focus!  I adore them all, and I'm so grateful for this role of motherhood!  I'm so imperfect and some days feel that they deserve so much more, but my love and admiration for each of them grows more each day!